Not a Feel Good Moment

Noah is obsessed with playing outside, which is such a great thing! He will go and get one of his “la la’s,” toy lawn mowers, and roam around the driveway or the yard. Noah will also play with chalk, his beep beep ride in car, trucks/cars, balls, and other outdoor toys that are in our toy bins in the garage.

When we get home from school (daycare), Noah instantly wants to jump out of the car and play outside. If my parents pick him up from school with me, they usually stick around and play outside too. If a paid driver picks me up at work and then we pick up Noah, we go right inside, because I cannot chase Noah around or see if he is in trouble or unsafe.

My Mom has a variety of medical challenges but helps out in any way possible. She comes over most days after school and will play outside with us. She cannot move well due to a variety of things, but she still participates and plays with Noah.

Yesterday, Noah, my Mom and I were outside, playing like usual, and Noah booked it into the neighbor’s lawn. When I sternly told him to come back, he would say “no.” Yes, he is already a stubborn toddler.

When I walked closer, he would go even farther, until he was on the neighbors front porch. Noah would not come back to me or to our yard, no matter what.

The neighbor opened her door because she must have heard us, or they must have a video doorbell, and Noah came to me after she opened the door because he does not really know her. We immediately went inside, but I tried not to make a big deal of it or make him think that he was in trouble.

Yes, we teach Noah boundaries and limits in terms of going into the road etc. but he really was not doing anything wrong. He was exploring like any other kid and if I could see, I would see that he was not in any danger. We are working on listening to Mommy and Daddy when we tell him to “come here,” but that is a work in progress and he is still a little guy.

This experience tore me up so bad and made me feel so helpless. I explained to my husband that it was like someone watching their dog run into the road with a car coming, and you can’t do anything about it. I know this was not the road, but it easily could have been.

I felt like a failure, and it was embarrassing. I do not think that our new neighbors know that I cannot see and although I don’t care what they think, she was probably wondering what the heck was going on.

I couldn’t see if he was in danger, where he was going, and if he was, I really couldn’t do much about it quickly enough.

Just another bump in the road or challenge that I am facing as a blind Mom, but that one really stung.

We have used the leash a few times but Noah cannot explore much and it is quite annoying for both of us. Let the brainstorming begin!

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